May. 17th, 2015

bluealoe: (BlueAloe)
I successfully finished my first year of graduate school. I'm not quite sure how that happened.

It was a tremendously difficult year. I had to adjust to living in a new town, meet new people, and learn how to be a student again. There were a LOT of readings, even more papers and projects, countless meetings with classmates, and dealing with difficult professors. And doing all of that while wondering if I'm doing the right thing by going to grad school. The good new is that after a year of school, I'm pretty well convinced museum work is the right career path for me. But it's not easy, not at all.

We're moving out of our apartment on Tuesday, spending a few weeks in Syracuse, then flying out to Seattle for my internship. It should be a very interesting summer. I should be excited about it, and I'm sure I will be once it gets closer, but right now I'm just sad. I've spent almost every day for the last nine months with nineteen other people, and now I won't see any of them (except maybe one or two) for the next three months. Despite my introvertedness, I did get very used to having my classmates around, and the idea of not seeing them for three months is so weird. And when we do get back, everyone will be a bit different, and they'll be a new group of incoming students to get used to. I know change can be good, but it's also really damn hard. It took me most of the last year to get used to the grad school thing, and just when I think I've got the hang of it, it all changes. Why does life keep doing this to me?r

Tonight I was at our neighbors' apartment, sitting on the porch as the sun set, listening to Rory, Ryan, and Noah strumming guitars and singing "Let It Be", feeling content and peaceful. Yet somehow, still sad.

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